Breakups hit hard. Even if you were the one who ended things, that empty space afterward can feel huge. One minute you’re fine, the next you’re crying into your pillow wondering how to get through the day.
The good news? You don’t have to figure it all out at once. This isn’t about “getting over it” overnight. It’s about small, real ways you can take care of yourself so you slowly start to feel like you again.
Let’s talk about how to do that—without fake positivity or pressure to bounce back before you’re ready.
1️⃣ Let Yourself Feel the Mess
You don’t have to pretend to be okay when you’re not. Let yourself cry, rage, feel numb—whatever’s coming up. That’s part of healing, not weakness.
Sometimes you might feel fine in the morning, then crushed by nightfall. That’s normal. Grief comes in waves.
Give yourself moments to just sit with what hurts. Journaling helps, or even talking out loud to yourself.
And if you need to vent to a trusted friend, do it. Don’t worry about “oversharing.” Real friends get it.
This isn’t about wallowing forever. It’s about not shoving your feelings down where they’ll pop up later in worse ways.
2️⃣ Prioritize Rest, Even If You Can’t Sleep
Breakups mess with your head—and your sleep. Lying there wide awake replaying everything is the worst.
So if you can’t sleep, at least rest. Close your eyes. Breathe slowly. Let your body know it’s safe to relax.
Try listening to calming music or a sleep meditation. No pressure to actually fall asleep—just let yourself unwind.
If your mind starts spiraling, remind yourself: “This is hard right now, but it won’t always feel this way.”
Good rest helps you cope better. And even small moments of calm matter more than you think.
3️⃣ Get Outside, Even for Five Minutes
The walls of your room can start to feel like they’re closing in. Fresh air helps, even if you don’t feel like moving.
Open a window. Step onto your balcony. Walk to the corner and back. Nature has a way of reminding us that life goes on.
If you can, sit under a tree or near water. Let yourself breathe, look around, and feel the world holding you up.
Some days you’ll want to do more—maybe a hike, or a longer walk. But don’t pressure yourself. Start small.
Every step outside helps clear your mind, even a little.
4️⃣ Reconnect with Old Parts of Yourself
Sometimes a breakup leaves you wondering who you are without that person. A good way to remember? Go back to the things you loved before.
Dig out that hobby you abandoned. Play that playlist you loved before the relationship. Watch your comfort movies.
It can feel bittersweet at first. But soon it starts reminding you: I existed before this, and I’ll exist after.
Reach out to friends you lost touch with. Even a simple text: “Hey, I’ve missed you.”
These small reconnections help piece your identity back together in gentle ways.
5️⃣ Limit Contact (and Stalking) on Social Media
It’s so tempting to peek at their stories, check who they’re hanging out with, overanalyze their posts. But it rarely helps.
Consider muting or unfollowing for a while. It’s not about bitterness—it’s about protecting your peace.
Social media can trick your brain into thinking you’re still connected. That makes it harder to move forward.
If you slip up and look, don’t beat yourself up. Just notice how it makes you feel, and try again next time.
Boundaries with technology are self-care too.
6️⃣ Feed Yourself, Even If You Have No Appetite
Heartbreak can make food the last thing on your mind. But your body still needs nourishment to heal.
Keep it simple. A smoothie, some toast, a handful of nuts. Anything is better than nothing.
If cooking feels overwhelming, ask a friend to drop something off, or order in.
Comfort food is fine—but balance it with something that fuels you too.
And remember: eating is a way to tell your body, “I care about you.”
7️⃣ Let Your Space Reflect the New You
Your room or apartment might feel like it’s full of memories. Give it a refresh.
Move furniture. Change your bedding. Light a candle that smells nothing like them.
You don’t have to redecorate your whole place. Even small changes help signal a fresh start.
It’s not about erasing the past. It’s about making space for what’s next.
And bonus: cleaning or reorganizing can be surprisingly soothing when emotions feel messy.
8️⃣ Plan Tiny Joys to Look Forward To
You don’t have to book a big trip or take up skydiving to feel better.
Plan small things you can actually look forward to: a coffee date with yourself, a new book, a funny movie night.
These little joys remind you that good moments still exist, even now.
Write them on a sticky note, or in your calendar, so they feel real.
And if you don’t feel excited right away, that’s okay. The point is to gently plant seeds of hope.
9️⃣ Give Yourself a Social Break When You Need It
Some friends will want to help by cheering you up. That can be wonderful—but also exhausting.
It’s okay to say: “I appreciate you, but I need some quiet time today.”
Balance connection with solitude. Both are healing in their own way.
And when you do spend time with people, choose those who leave you feeling lighter, not drained.
Healing doesn’t always look social. Sometimes it looks like a peaceful evening alone.
🔟 Let Time Be Your Friend, Not Your Enemy
There’s no deadline for getting over someone. Some days will feel like progress. Others will feel like square one.
Don’t measure your healing against anyone else’s. Your timeline is yours alone.
When you feel stuck, remind yourself: “This is part of the process. I’m still moving forward, even if it doesn’t feel like it.”
Each day adds a tiny layer of strength, even when you can’t see it.
And one day, you’ll notice the weight has lifted a little. You’ll breathe easier. That day will come.